Gunshots and Robbers

Working on a combined 2 hours of "good REM" sleep over the past two nights, I come to this post weary eyed and fatigued. The last two nights have been infamous in our callow marriage. Here is a recap:

Monday/Tuesday Night:

On Monday nights Sarah goes to girl's Bible study and leaves me and Wrigley to watch our "Man" TV shows (The First 48 and Monday Night Football). As I settled in with my man Wrigley, storms started approaching the greater Memphis area and lightning and thunder started rocking the house, and the satellite dish. It was perfect for watching my episode of the First 48 that documents detectives during the first 48 hours after a homicide for those who don't know. The weather added an extra level of suspense to the show. This particular episode followed a homicide of an innocent man killed by stray gunfire. Apparently the murderer went to an apartment complex with an AK47 and shot up an apartment of a guy who stole a rock of crack from him 5 years earlier. Talk about not letting go. So while this "Joe" shot up the 1st floor apartment, he got a little crazy and let the bullets spray into the second floor apartment where he struck a man and killed him. Wrigley and I thoroughly enjoyed the episode at the moment, and finished the night off with some MNF. When Sarah got home at 9:45 the weather had not let up. Still thundering and lightning and windy. Shortly after Sarah got home, we got in bed b/c I get grumpy if I don't get in bed by 10:30 and get my beauty rest. I didn't take me five seconds to fall asleep, and shortly thereafter I hit my REM stage of sleep. I would say it was on my second cycle of REM sleep and my 5,679th sheep to count I woke up to a sudden BOOM BOOM BOOM!!! Sarah popped up faster than Usain Bolt, and we both looked at each other and screamed what is going on! I instantly thought that someone was shooting up my neighbors house like on the First 48, so I hit the deck and tell Sarah that someone is shooting someone with an AK47. Some of you might not believe this could happen, but we do live in the Detroit of the South...Memphis. Forehead Sweating and Heart Jumping out of my chest, I get the courage to look out the window. When I look out, I see white flashes coming from the power line and the BOOM BOOM continues. I think Santa is here early and he got his sleigh stuck on the power line, or the house is going to blow up. We are freaked by now, and scrambling to get the power companies number. Luckily it quit and the transformer finally blew. Needless to say we both had so much adrenaline running through our bodies that we could have bench pressed cars, and sleep was no where on our radar.

Tuesday/Wednesday Night:

After the hitches in my sleep cycles on Monday night, I was not up for doing anything on Tuesday night. Sarah and I cooked a nice little dinner and posted up on the couch to watch Get Smart. I highly recommend this movie, especially if you are looking to take a break from suspenseful shows like the First 48 like I was after Monday night. We finish up the show and head off to bed to get what we thought was going to be a nice full night's rest. In fact, we purposely got in the bed at 9:45 to be extra rested. Of course it only took me a count of 30 seconds to get to bed, and I assume Sarah was out shortly thereafter. Busy dreaming about being a middle reliever for the Chicago Cubs, I am woken by a beep beep on our alarm keypad in our room at 12:45. For the second night in a row, Sarah and I both erect quickly and look at each other and scream, "What is going on?!?" After the pad beeped one more time, the house alarm starts going off. For those of you who don't have home alarms this is not a fun way to wake up. I have never practiced a burglar alarm drill before, and it showed when I got up. The first thing I did was walk out the door and go check the house. I think the number one rule is to not panic, then second is the rule to not approach a Robber. Well I was breaking both of them at the same time. Again, my adrenaline was rushing, and I was ready to punch someone out like I was Kimbo Slice. After checking out the house like Steve Carrell on Get Smart, I see no signs of broken glass or robbers. While I was going all detective on the house, Sarah is frantically dialing 911 and calling the cops. The siren is blaring, neighbors lights are turning on, the dogs are howling, it is total chaos. I try every code in the book to turn off the alarm, but just can't get it to work. A couple of minutes pass and here come blue lights down the street, a little bit of relief comes over me. The officer and I punch every code imaginable in. I think we even tried up, down, up, down, a, b, a, b, select...or whatever that code on Nintendo was. After unsuccessful attempts, I take it outside and shut the breaker to the house off. AAAAHHHHHHHHH....what a relief...silence. Well that was short lived...a minute later the alarm goes off again...luckily when I punch the code in again it stops. By this time there are 3 cops at the house, and alarm company is calling both Sarah and me. After all the mayhem, everyone finally leaves and Sarah and I retreat to the bed. It is like Deja Vu, adrenaline pumping and sleep not in the forecast. We finally calm down a little and what do you know...the alarm keypad beeps again, and again, and again...The battery is dead. I am so tired of the alarm at this time that I unhook and unarm everything. The robbers are free to come in if they want. We finally get back in bed at 1:45 and try to sleep, but end up watching Talk Soup all night. What a terrible two nights. Hopefully tonight is the night that I get my much needed 8 hours. Gunshots and Robbers...please stay away!!!!!!!!