Wednesday, February 09, 2005

At what age is it o.k.?

As I sit here in the office at 7 something this morning, I start to check my email, go buy some crackers from the snack machine, and fill up my coffee cup. So i sit down to enjoy my typical breakfast at the office when all of the sudden it is interrupted by a very loud burp by a fellow co-worker. this co-worker will go unnamed, but it rhymes with Dina. and yes, it is a female. this got me thinking about things. at what age does it become o.k. to burp and fart in public. knowing that "tina" is about 45 years old, it has to be younger than that. i, on the other hand, like to keep my bodily functions a private matter, and i am 22 years old. so, we have a range 22-45. so i do more research on this issue. my manager and i were checking over a load that was supposed to be shipped the other day. as we checked i smelled something wicked bad, and i looked up to see my manager with a smirk on his face. now he is about 35 years old. i feel like he is new to the publicity of his bodily functions, so i am assuming that 34 years old is about right. I am thinking that 34 years old is the official age when you can publicly trade your bodily functions. if you have another idea of what age it is please get back to me on this.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I feel that the age is directly related to the rate at which you loose your hearing. It will be different for everyone. Once you get to the age where you think it is silent but in actuality it was heard by quite a few. That is just my theory on the subject though. Keep writing gray. This should be interesting.
-Mark Steele-

Anonymous said...

fart/burp etiquite 101:
1. Know your audience. For example if you are a woman (aged 45 or so) you should never allow an audible flatulence to escape your body in front of younger men. This is just disgusting. If, however, you are a man and you are either with friends or someone you have authority over, you should feel free to take any necessary gaseous relief you need.
2. Never think you are alone, because you never are. For example, if you are on an elevator by yourself and you are overcome by the urge to break wind, just wait until you get off the elevator. Murphy's Law says that if you break wind on an elevator, someone will be waiting to get on the elevator when you leave (or worse the lift will stop and pick someone up - leaving you, the smell, and the new person all alone for a few floors). The corollary to this says that the person who is waiting to get on the elevator is going to be the new girl from accounting who you were going to ask out.
- DW

Anonymous said...

I feel that this is not a problem just in our day and time. I don't remember my Grandfather because he died shortly after I was born. But I am told by my Dad and Uncle Jim that I (and my cousin Jimbo) would have loved hangin' out with him. Anyway, "Daddy Kit" as was his nickname was a doctor in Birmingham. And I can't tell you the countless stories I have heard of him 'breaking wind' around his wife, Myra. I guess he was in his late fifties that this became such a worsening problem for my Grandmother, "Mama Dear." Every time Daddy Kit broke wind--and he would do it with such a discrete fashion (aka silent but violent)--the second that stinch entered Mama Dear's sense of smell, she would hit Daddy Kit with her back hand upon his chest and yell, "Kit! Why do you have to do that?!" (or something of the like) But Daddy Kit, with the biggest grin on his face would always say, "Myra, it's just a natural body function!"

I will repeat my first comment...I feel that this is not a problem just in our day and time. In fact, I don't feel it's a problem at all...it's "JUST a natural body function!" Anyone, at any time, any age should always let their body function naturally. And heck, don't slow it down; just let it fly!

WTG